The Resume that clichéd the job

We were looking for an assistant in the office and got this delightful resume that really impressed

Think the lesson here is be honest in your resume

The Resume

To hoem it mey konsern,

I want to aplaaiy for the job what I saw in the pepaer.

I can Tyaaip reelie kwiek wit one finggar and doo sums a counting..

I thienk I are good on the phoune and I nou I am a piepels person, Piepels reelie siem to respont to me well. Certin women and all the menn. I nou my spellieng is not to good but I find that I Offen can get a job throe my persinaletie.

My sallerie is open sou we can diskas dat yoe want to pei me and wat yoe thienk that I am worthy, I can start iemieditely. Thank yoe in atwaans fore yore anser.
Houpfulie Yore best apliecant sou farr.

Sinsceerly,
lotty (short for Laurette)
PS : Bekose my resimay is a bit short - below is a piekture of me.

And of course our response

Dear Lotty ,

It's OK honey,

we've got spell checker.

See you Monday...